When you look at this picture, you see 4 people in a beautiful background...what you don't see are the struggles Del and I went through just to be at this one event. You know, I used to take every day life for granted...I used to take the fact my grandma was around for granted...until she died. I took my health for granted until it was taken from me...and I certainly took my children for granted because they were there everyday...until I had to send them to live with their dad.
Yet in my own defense, there really isn't a textbook out there on how to deal with the many issues I have had to - suicide, Alzheimer's disease, Hurricane Brandi and the ole' paternity and extrinsic fraud crap... You can't go back and undo what was said, nor can you change what has been done...but I will say this IT TAKES TWO PEOPLE TO CHANGE THE RELATIONSHIP, NOT JUST ONE...IF BOTH PARTIES ARE NOT WILLING TO PUT DIFFERENCES ASIDE YOU WILL NEVER BE ABLE TO HAVE A RELATIONSHIP, NO MATTER HOW HARD YOU TRY.
I thought I never would be around my sister...and here I am trying to plan a Cruise with her in a year... I never thought I would even want to be around her, and you know...we talk quite often and in almost 5 months haven't argued even once. I love the relationship we have, how close we are now...and I wouldn't trade that for the world... I'm not sure if I'm more excited to party with Allison, or to have a long overdue honeymoon with my husband since we have never really had one in the first place!!!
In a week from yesterday - starts my "week from hell", one that I have spent the past 11 years hating...for different reasons. I lost my grandma Tuckett in August 98, my ex-husband Richie August 5, 1999...and was in the Salt Lake City tornado that hit LDS Hospital on 8/11/99... By August 2000, I had a repressed memory come out, by the next summer I was hooked on meth because I wanted to die... I quit cold turkey 3/31/02...and have been clean ever since... By 8/5/04 - 5 years to the day after my ex died...my dad passed away - 3 days after my birthday.
I will end by telling each of you, my readers...THANK YOU...for not only coming to see what I have been up to creative wise, or check in on me...thank you for your influence on me, and your love that you have shown me. I am excited for a few new changes coming up at Memories in Tyme...but I am going to keep you guessing for now... No matter what it is - it is only the first secret of many that I have planned for the next few months! I have been working really hard, and have a long, long way to go before I can look back and say "I have accomplished what I wanted to"... As I let you go...look again at the picture above...this is the first time I had seen my kids in 6 years...for reasons that was not my own, but being a mom first I refused to let the Hurricane Brandi situation affect THEM. The one thing that can never be taken away from the 4 of us....the memories of that week and how the HEALING HAS BEGUN...
Lynda Jeffs
Memories in Tyme
a beautiful pic! what is important is now and the future.. you should be proud of your accomplishments!! yes, crafts make me feel good and gives me a sense of something that I CREATED.. makes me feel good. Scrapbooking has given me some healing as i grew up in foster care and life wasn't all that good.
ReplyDeleteI'm proud of you!! keep the faith!
doris
parkernana5@cox.net